aiEarly March. It became clear that there would be no heating, that shelling finally ruined the boiler room under the slabs. But the cold was not as frightening as the silence of our air defense and the sounds of the bombers. 

aiThe howling of the air alert almost did not stop. Having destroyed our air defense, the Russian planes began night raids on the city. The approaching rumble ...

aiMy heart missed a beat and I thought: That's it. The end... The hum moves away, and I hear a distant explosion. I exhale with relief: “Not this time.” And between such raids, a roll call with friends: “How are you?” ... “Alive” ... “Very close, it’s scary” ... “The house shook” ...

aiThirst. Constantly. And the fear that the water is running out. I suddenly realized that I had not eaten for more than a day. And that I can't do it, I can’t cope with the nervous tension. 

aiI had a psychologist friend who once worked in the Ministry of Emergency Situations. I wrote to her asking for help. She immediately called back and offered therapy: "Try to feel this part of your body ... now this part ..." But I could hear only the air raid siren howling. I didn't feel my body.

aiRealizing that food, medicine and water were running out, I decided to get out of the city. Taxis still took people to the station to the evacuation trains, but not from my area. I was looking for someone who could help us through my friends on social networks, and some volunteers immediately agreed. Because of the frequent shelling of my area, they could not reach us for two days.

aiFinally, a minivan arrived, there were no seats, we sat on the floor. They had already picked up a woman with her two children. She held them tightly to her. Her gaze was tense and frightened ...

aiI handed the volunteers some money with words of gratitude. I knew they were doing it for free, but I wished to pay for the gas. A young man Anton, embarrassedly, turned his blue eyes aside, smiled and said: “I won’t take it. You’ll need it." Then I handed him an apple ... 

aiA month later, during the evacuation of the elderly, Anton will die from a shell fired by the Russian multiple rocket launcher called Grad in a civilian area. The bread that they were delivering for people will be splashed with his blood. Anton left behind a mother, a young wife and a baby.

aiIt was scary at the railway station, an air raid could begin at any moment. We went to the platform, it was full of people. The police announced that women with children would be the first to board the train.